


On Reflection

by Sukuangtou



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2003), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Brothers, Character Death Mentioned, Episode: s03e21 Same As It Never Was, Feels, Post-Same As It Never Was, Same As It Never Was
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-11
Updated: 2016-11-11
Packaged: 2018-08-30 10:40:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8529922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sukuangtou/pseuds/Sukuangtou
Summary: Donatello never wants to see Mikey at his full potential.





	

Donatello never wants to see Mikey at his full potential.

His brothers and father speak on this at least once a month. The ‘what if Mikey concentrated’ and ‘if only he paid more attention to training’. Splinter believes that if he could have the same ability to focus as Leo, or even Raph, then he would be a formidable force. Donatello had even once joked that if Mikey could only focus half as much as them there would be a complete turnaround in his accuracy and talent. No one had disagreed.

That was all before though, before he had been forced to see Mikey fully matured, worn by the world and lacking his famous cheer. His brother was quick, all his aims hit their targets, and his acrobatic nature would rival any trapeze artist. It was almost beautiful to watch him fight, as if standing over the shoulder as a great painter created a masterpiece. 

But it wasn’t his little brother.

His brother, the brother who had crept into his bed when they were young, should not be silent as they discuss their mission. He should not shrink away when Leo and Raph get into yet another dispute about blame and anger. He should never be slinking back into the shadows, out of sight and out of mind. 

God, he felt like such a bully. This wasn’t even _his_ Mikey; his childhood might be widely different for all Don knew. But suddenly every jab thrown his little brother’s way, every small comment, every time Don had cursed Mikey for even entering his lab, was this to be the result? A sullen, unenergetic, shell who had the entire fate of civilisation weighing down on his shoulders? 

And those times between planning their mission against the Shredder and carrying it out, those few days of logistics and organisation, Donatello could see the marks unknowingly left by his older brothers. Before Michelangelo trained with a grin and a fluidity that Don was secretly envious of, but now he was serious, constantly frowning, a mixture of the anger of Raph and the repetitiveness of Leo. Quietly, Don wondered what his Mikey was picking up from him. What was the message he received?

Because Mikey had always been impressionable. Back when Leo, Raph and himself had learnt to walk, Mikey wanted to walk. When they awkwardly chattered with their forming words, suddenly Mikey would never stop babbling. Even their first years of training, Mikey had always copied their techniques and stances, never Splinters. If his older brothers were doing it, then he was doing it. 

And so thirty years of two bitter, bickering brothers had left their permanent impression of the youngest turtle, even if he knew it or not.

A slow ache had developed in Don’s chest, and he desperately tried to find the time to pull Michelangelo to one side, to apologise and hold him, and tell him it was going to be alright, like his brothers should have done long ago. But then they were attacking the Shredder and Karai was sending out those horrible bots. Those bots which were to be his baby brother’s end. No amount of grace, talent, or concentration would have saved him from that.

Don does not take part in those quiet conversations in the dojo anymore. Instead he steers Mikey away from hurtful words to spend some one-on-one time together in his lab. His brother loves it. Don teaches him how to make goo (on the promise it will never appear in any pranks that come his way) and rockets with baking powder and vinegar. He finds it a welcome break were for once he gets to feel like a teenager again, something none of them have truly felt for a long time. 

Donatello never wants to see Mikey at his full potential, because that would mean the loss of the brother he knows and loves. He would rather have a happy, healthy Michelangelo any day, and it is something he would go to hell and back to save.

**Author's Note:**

> Short but painful to write.
> 
> On a side note Splinter is quite being a bully here, but is having to talk to his eldest on Mikey's behaviour so they know how and what to do with Mikey in the battlefield (keeping an eye on him etc). He has the best interests in heart, but it would still be painful to hear.


End file.
